So as you can likely see, when people say they're "proud" of someone else's accomplishments, they're really saying they are entitled to some honor or credit in the accomplishing of those accomplishments; and when people say they are "humbled" by other people recognizing them for their accomplishments, what they really mean is they . Setting goals you can achieve, also called "realist goals," reduces the chance of frustration or doubting yourself or your abilities. Rather than the child feeling respected for their efforts, they may feel patronised, put-down. So you better know in which tone theyre saying so. "If by a "Liberal" they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people-their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights and their civil liberties-someone who believes we can break through the stalemate and suspicions that grip us in our policies abroad, if that is . Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before stumbling. This expression is much more self-focused, i.e. the person who says that is actually talking about themselves, not about me, and by saying that is drawing the recognition away from me towards themselves. . I am here for the same reason. It's a way of congratulating someone for having accomplished something impressive. I know Im a couple of years behind, but was thinking about it this morning. Patricia Velasquez. But I want to let you know that I accept you whether I agree with you or not, and I'm committed to working on our relationship so we both feel . This topic came to mind because I recently saw a friend / mentor and told him about a meaningful professional accomplishment. Encouraging children and others to be proud of themselves is healthier. You are asked at the cocktail party what you do. (thanks to TK and Andy for helping think this through.). Mull over various relaxing options, like meeting up for coffee or tea, and then send along one concrete plan, Manly says. Well cover some of the better responses you can give, like thanking them, making them feel special, or making them laugh. Last Updated on February 28, 2023 by Ketan. Here are 5 other ways to say "I'm proud of you" to older children: 06 "It's been an honor to watch you grow up." This can be used for both a teen and an adult. From what I read, she falls into the category of know them well but I wonder if its not something a bit out of place. The 9 Best Things to Say to Someone Who's Lost Weight - Life by Daily Burn Aw yeah, yeah, yeah. The child has done well enough for the parent to bring out the big guns the proud word. If you feel stuck on getting that pride going or can't seem to identify the traits or qualities you're most proud of in yourself, go back in time. Proud Boys chairman Enrique Tarrio poses with a Proud Boys member at a rally in Delta Park in Portland, Oregon, on September 26, 2020. I grew up being complimented for my looks . How often do we utter this common parenting phrase, in moments of pleasure at our childs latest achievement? For me, this was a huge take-away moment. translation - How do you say "proud of you" in Chinese? - Chinese If you had a hand in that success then I think it is ok to say, I am so proud of you as it does imply that the speaker played a part. As your friend I want you to know that there is nothing I wouldn't do for you. But, it can also be a bit overwhelming because it puts the spotlight on us and can make us feel exposed. Ive been totally using that word all wrong sheesh, all the complaints about the misuse of the word makes me feel bad about what and how I been addressing my peers and friends. 20 of the Best Encouraging Words that Hold any Caregivers Up 06 "Tim, I keep wondering what Dad would say if he were alive right now. Image used under license from Shutterstock, research suggesting that parents saying "I'm proud of you", protective role in a their child's mental health, Should Children And Parents Be Friends? So, lets get started! And they both say that you're over and done with me. Q&A on racism and diversity: How to respond when someone says - EEHealth If you get a new job, get a participants medal for a 10K or do anything deemed worthwhile, friends, family and acquaintances will say they are so proud of you!!!. Let them know that you are grateful for their support. It will show your appreciation for their words, it will help to strengthen your relationship, and it will create a positive and constructive environment. 50 Things You Can Say to Make Your Child Feel Great 4 . It will also help to give you a boost of confidence. (a short read). I knew it, if no one was going to like this. Thank you. Ben Casnocha It is a darn good thing that you wrote your opinion; that I found it tonight, and that comments continue to be accepted. 6. Dont just thank them, you can reply with some cute responses to let them know that youre proud the same as they are. The proud feeling transcends from child to parent. Who are children then living their life for - themselves, or their parent? Don't disguise it as concern, either. Might you quietly ask yourself Who was it that put in the hard hours to get a good report? When your partner is mad at you, your flirty responses to I hate you will certainly make them laugh. They dont have more power than you, and in some cases less, but their opinion matters because they know you so well, and because you respect them and what they think. 3. "Scorned ex-girlfriends are the worst. I dont think my children have any problem with this because they know, in many other ways, I love them dearly. Marilyn, My life changed the day I heard Mr. Rogers tell me he liked me just the way I was. What do they perceive - when a parent (or teacher) says "Im proud of you"? For what? The best way to do this is to express your own feelings of appreciation and gratitude for their words. What to Say to Someone Who Is Depressed - Verywell Mind 10 Ways To Say "I'm Proud Of You" To Someone Who Deserves It - Grammarhow She reciprocated. For many of us, hearing this phrase is like a warm hug. I was talking about this statement Im Proud of you to a friend.I was annoyed about someone saying they were proud of me who barley knows me. I can point them out to my friends and say, Those are my sons!. Likewise, these are special, cute, and funny replies when someone says I am proud of you and you dont know what to respond next. You can accomplish anything that you put your mind to. Thanks. "Well," you respond with enthusiasm, "I'm so excited right now. 2014, 2016, 2019. Who put in the practice in order to win that tennis match? I believe many people do not understand and appreciate the expression Im proud FOR you. The only people there who went to university were the pharmacist, the physician/surgeon, lab technologist, x-ray technician and the like, as well as the school teachers. You reject that person's generosity. Listen to your inner wisdom, and make a note of the meaning that resonates with you. Believe me when I tell you that it is not meant so kindly elsewhere. Children who are continually praised, or told "Im proud of you" may not believe their parent. facilitator, with over 1000 parents completing the course with her. If someone calls you out for saying something offensive, remember that your intent can be different than your impact. 5. But this seems less common. So thank you Ben, for after read the above I feel happy with my Im thrilled for you, You must feel really proud and the like. The Obama campaign needs to walk this one back and pronto. Yes, I agree that it can also be very strong coming from siblings and spouses/lovers. I think the phrase Im proud of you is insulting, for the reasons noted above. Let me tell you why. How to Let Your Children Know You Are Proud of Them - Verywell Family But arguing about what words mean is pointless- meanings vary. I was damned proud of her for overcoming this setback and told her so. Living with a parents disapproval, or continually seeking a parents approval, is a life-long burden. Congratulations to our dearest son. How Do I Tell Him I Like Him The Best Method (Proven), What Does It Mean When She Calls You Daddy, Im so glad that youre proud of me. By accepting the compliment and reflecting on your qualities, you may feel more satisfied in life. When someone tells you that they are proud of you, not only are they impressed by something you did and who you are, but they also want others to know it. If you want to reply saying you're proud of the person saying he's proud of you, the only correct answer out of those four is "I'm proud of you too". "We will always remember. 1. Let them know how much better you feel now that you're smokefree. "Nothing is ever wrong. Suddenly I found myself questioning my rather lame Im thrilled for you. "I'm proud of you" is often associated with mentor-mentee relationships, something that a teacher or parent might say. but with my Mothers words of wisdom always echoing. Children whose parents constantly say "I'm proud of you" may grow to be adults who rely on other people's opinion of them for validation. To be sure, "I'm really proud of you buddy" can sometimes occur between friends. Be proud of who you are. God being what He is, at once moral and all-powerful, the immoral life is doomed to overthrow, whether the immorality consist in grasping rapacity, proud self-aggrandizement, cruel exaction, exulting triumph or senseless idolatry. The Mindset of the Ambitious Educational Elite, Thinking Clearly about a Persons Substance Amidst Stylistic Differences, On Intentionally Vague, Mystique-Infused Explanations of Talent, Book Notes: Lost & Found by Kathryn Shulz, Mindfulness of Consciousness Meditation Retreat. Im so glad that youre there for giving me support. I think children want simply to be accepted and respected as themselves. It's a pleasure to congratulate you on this lovely moment. 1. You worked so hard, you really deserve that job! You had nothing whatsoever to do with any of this you pond-bottom suckers.. I wouldnt get anxious about it. Congratulations on your graduation, dear son. Simply thanking them or hugging them is an immediate reaction to it. "You make me so mad.". Usually friends say "I'm so happy for you" or "Really nice job!" Im happy that youre with me in good and bad times. Since first publishing this piece, I've spent many years thinking about, and discussing, why children might like to hear their parents say "I'm proud of you". Maybe instead of telling me hes proud of me, like its such a surprise, maybe he should have just offered to do the dishes. Give yourself time to process your reaction to something before jumping in with a response. "), Friend: "I'm proud of you for being brave and standing up to your boss", As the friend who has found that courage, is this statement something you would appreciate? Then there's emotional attraction. Proud Boys Intended To Kill Mike Pence and Nancy Pelosi, FBI Witness Says You know that I'm bound to see you. People Who Say These 5 Words Have Very Low Emotional Intelligence. How come you didnt come to watch this match? Paul urged his young companion Timothy to be "a worker who does not need to be ashamed" (2 Timothy 2:15). What is the appropriate response when someone says they're proud of you Yeah, this means a lot to me. Continually acting to seek the approval of a parent is onerous for a child. But the Bible warns us against a self-centered, egotistical pride that says, "Look at me; look at . Thank you so much! When someone says they are busy, it could mean that they are busy. said Christopher Robin. Feb 10, . Reading the Parent Effectiveness Training book, or attending a PET course, will help develop positive and respectful parent-child relationships, and explore alternatives to praise. 26 Reasons to Be Proud of Yourself | Psychology Today But is that really very useful? PJ. (Of course, there are always people who try to suck up to youbut hopefully you can see through it!) Often the 'I'm proud of you' I get from strangers includes an unwanted and inappropriate familiarity, a hug a bit too long or a bit too hard, a knowing look and more emphasis on the 'I' than the 'you' in the 'I . The phrase "Im proud of you" insinuates that the speaker (parent, teacher, co-worker, boss) has more experience, or power, or in some manner has the right to pronounce their opinion, on someone elses effort. Granted that in many relationships, Im proud of you would strike a patronizing or otherwise false note. And black adults (57%) are more likely than whites (43%) or Hispanics (42%) to know someone who falls into . In what context? 14. After the game I took her back to her car, gave her a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. but not the p-word. The way you _____ is such a perfect addition for our family. First, there's physical attraction. 8. One of the most common phrases they use to express their feelings is Im proud of you. Renew your PET skills; complete the full course over flexible times; or one-off parenting sessions. When someone says Im proud of you, they are expressing their admiration, respect, and gratitude for something you have done. But this will be seen as an overreaction. Im so happy to have you in my life, thanks! It was then that I realized that who I am is a unique, valuable, and loveable person. When you say, "I'm proud of you," you may actually be simply rejoicing in another. 8. Who is saying this to whom? Its really a way of saying I am really the one who is special, Im the boss.and what it deserves is not thank you but rather, well kiss my ass you condescending bastard..get a lifethis proud of you nonsense is also related to people who have to say WELL GOOD FOR YOU when doing something mundane..like, someone catches me reading a book in publicoh, you are readingWELL, GOOD FOR YOU!! Again, these phrases are my evaluation of my childs effort. 1. It reaffirms the choice you made is good and right, nothing more. Instead of acting out of rage over . 2. 25 Supportive Texts To Send Someone Who's Stressed Out - Bustle I also told her I had a great time & that she picks up my spirits. My husband just said it to me a couple of days ago (for a little achievement I just made in my physique) and it made me happy as well. With teens and adults, saying "I'm proud of you" is a bit different. Private face-to-face sessions and course not available at this point. People Who Say These 5 Words Have Very Low Emotional Intelligence | Inc.com But to be proud of them? I got into a conflice with her sons girlfriend because this young woman was working in a store behind the til and had made a gross error in punching out my cash register amounts on my bill and I had to go and confront her to get a refund as the store owed me about $50 due to her errors. 27. As parents, it's important to stay calm and resist the urge to blame our kids or anyone else, really for our emotions. It may be a taunt from them to do something unusual. 11. Health Gap. Maybe Im mad, because it makes me feel like he thinks I wasnt doing enough before I started back at work- like carrying children inside of my body for nearly two years, plus birthing them, plus never sleeping, plus cleaning for HOURS upon HOURS everyday, plus cooking, plus plus plus wasnt enough to be proud of. Sure, they get angry with one another, as do all brothers, but they forgive and move on. 4. Thanks to you, as well for being such a caring and supportive partner. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude can help to boost your confidence and can help you to overcome self-doubt. An acquaintance commented on a recent Facebook post I made that he was proud of me and immediately I felt so mad about that but couldnt figure out why. I think I instinctively recognized that the balance of power had somehow been upset, but couldnt put my finger on it. How to Tell If Someone Doesn't Care About You - Psych Central If this is the case, then of whom is the parent really proud? Might as well as them to stop saying yall or bless her heart.. Her future mother-in-law (my friend) told me later she was proud of me. Someone who credibly says "I'm proud of you" usually has two characteristics. Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window). Here subject and object are the same person. But who are you to affirm? You certainly will. You could feel annoyed and put out. And, you are the best thing ever to happen to me. Graduates: TBA, Grandparents: PET for Grandparents. 4. When somebody says that you are wrong: "You are entitled to your incorrect opinion." To each his own. I admire your ability to ___________. Oh.. very good. And Im so ashamed of you. "How I do love you!" Its more potent because they have seen struggles in their life, and within that perspective, they still acknowledge the effort I have put into the achievement as deserving of recognition. If you teach someone maths and they pass their exam same thing they are good because they have taken notice of your teaching. Talents Compliments. A teacher or a mentor can be proud of their student, but you can't really be proud of your peers. http://pbskids.org/rogers/songLyricsImProudOfYou.html. 14. Its obviously a powerful word. Your email address will not be published. until recently when a Goddaughter won an amazing internship, beating 2000 other applicants, and her other Godmother put a message on Facebook saying how proud she was of her. So thank you, mom and dad! Your email address will not be published. Our children need to know that we believe in them, that we trust them, that we support them, that we love them, that we acknowledge them as individuals separate from us. I also have to let go of holding it against him, because I presume it was a well-meaning gaffeinstead of saying how happy he is for me, as hes never been belittling before. Glad that I keep our family tradition alive. ), belonging to my close friend, on her business page. I may never know but you can simply ask him if you question the genuineness in his response. However, is this what happens? But only emotionally intelligent people understand why. Self-doubt can make it hard to accept compliments and to express gratitude for the words of others. Immune Response. I was irritated by that remark. July 7, 2020 April 21, 2018 Briefly, some difficulties include: Four-year-old John shows his Mum a painting he's just done. I am in awe of your talent and accomplishments. I think we need to invent another word for that wonderful feeling in our own chest when someone we care for does something they feel proud about and we agree that they should feel proud. Pause before responding. The key words (for this discussion) are creditable to oneself. 16. 12. When A Guy Says You Are Amazing, What Does It Mean? - Live Bold and Bloom For going back to work when Im still hardly sleeping, due to having an 8 week old at home? "I guess we can't all get Ph.D.'s in science like I did.". . If He Says These 10 Things, He's Just Stringing You Along Until He It does not take it away from them. Use words that will strengthen your relationship. Like Im only worth anything just because Im making money? A person receiving this praise could also feel belittled it could feel as though their achievement was unexpected - a surprise to the other person. How do you feel about, "I'm proud of you"? - reddit But, what would be the better ways to respond to I am proud of you other than just saying thank you. What does it mean when someone tells you that they are proud of you? PJ, I think your ex still cares for you so your accomplishments evoke pride in her. But one doesn't want to say that they're not proud of their country if they're looking to lead it. This post was actually very helpful for me! Linda Adams, in her book Be Your Best, quotes Charleszetta Waddles (African American activist): You cant give people pride, but you can provide the kind of understanding that makes people look to their inner strengths and find their own sense of pride. 15+ Best Encouraging Words for Someone in Rehab to Stay Strong Tell me something else, Ive heard this at home. And, here are the respectful replies to respond with: 1. As in, he's purely attracted to your appearance. We all have people in our lives who make us feel special, appreciated, and respected. Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool that can help to encourage and motivate people. 20 Other Ways to Say "I'm Proud of You" with Sincerity I again said. When you respond to Im proud of you with gratitude, youre reinforcing the positive behavior that you want to see in yourself and others. To me, if someone I respect said they were proud of me, would mean much more and have a much better and more positive effect on me than if they said Im really happy for you because the feeling of someone being proud for me includes me, my efforts and achievements, and unites me with that person who said it at the moment of saying it. Im so glad to hear that. Try The Behaviour Window. 6. B Blue Apple Senior Member Im proud of myself, although saying it out loud doesnt make it better. Exactly the information I was looking for thank you! 25 EPIC Bible Verses About Pride And Humility (Proud Heart) It is arrogant. So - when a parent says, "Im so proud of you", is the parent taking the credit for the childs accomplishments? These two simple words"I care"can mean so much to a person who may be feeling like the entire world is against them. What does it mean when a woman says she's proud of you? Im proud of you could be seen as an external judgement a parents verdict on a childs performance. The Psychology of Bragging - Counselling Connection 0. You have always been there for me and our friendship is something that will never go away. We had a really nice time. Show your appreciation for their words and use your response to create a positive and constructive environment. She says "Good boy. From that day on, I felt like I couldnt really trust him, and now I know why. You look so much better!". If a friend said it to me, I might say "Thank you", but I'd be thinking "Well, who gave you authority over me, then?". A parent might say this to a child, perhaps. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. That proud phrase didnt bother me at first, but the more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder, what does she mean when she says shes proud of me? Probably no big deal but would be interested in input from others especially other females. Larissa is passionate about the skills taught in Effectiveness Training. Second, this very fact helps explain why we resent it if the praise comes from someone who isnt viewed as a mentor. While "sb is proud of him" can express positive meaning. Thank you so much. Required fields are marked *. Luke 18:9-14 ESV / 5 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful PJ, I will give my thoughts on your post at the end of my post. Why are you taking the credit for my effort? (I'd prefer "Congratulations! Interesting perspective. She and I are both married. 49 Best Responses To "I Am Proud Of You" (From Family And Friends) When someone insults you, the first thing you want to do is take a pause and a deep breath. Last week, I went back to my college homecoming without my wife. I started to cry with the realization that in my 40+ years I had never heard it from anyone but him. If there is a mentor relationship, fine, but when the relationship is supposed to be about equals, Connect, Converse and Communicate Better. 2. Its powerful. A strong argument is a solid one. It is a feeling of relief and it was all worth while you bringing them up properly. 48 Ways to Say 'I'm So Proud of You & What You've Done' Pretty much an entire generation of American kids heard it from Mr. Rogers. I think its about the underlying meaning of these words to a child. Someone has just gone out of their way to say something nice to you. 2. Embrace Pride There are positive reasons to listen when someone says they are proud of you. I still think she was doing this at the time. Someone else's pride in you does not usually translate to pride in yourself. Proud people: these are the 7 traits that they share How to Support Your Quitter | Smokefree