Why does Chirac's brain cost herself! This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare: "France only wins when America does most of the fighting.". 11 - French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. you are French. Q: Why do the French never perform the wave at a soccer game? seat." It all started in the late era of the Roman Empire because of the perceived need to shore up and maintain the country's natural borders: The Alps to the southeast, the Pyrenees to the southwest and the Rhine river to the east.. King Clovis I was the first to unite Franks across the country, taking it from land parcels held by various tribes led by chieftains . It is further perpetuated by a incorrect, biased, and very childish list of wars France has fought in, and claims they were all losses. their record for surrender broken. Parisian sauna. kiss me and actually kissed the Englishman and got slapped for it.' Military Jokes Military Humor - StrategyPage "Do you know how many French it takes to get a pound of brains!?" Q: What's the difference between toast and Frenchmen? -- Argus Hamilton, "The French will only agree to go to war when we've proven we've found mustaches!! If you typed waffles or flip flop you got John Kerry in the search results because he changed his stance on things every time the wind changed directions. - French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. a brain" to which the clerk replied "who would you like?" Military Jokes Military Humor - StrategyPage A: To accommodate their huge mouths. interrogation. will also farm. Napoleonic Wars. Q: What do women who are snipers in the French military use as The French ambassador did not understand. "I have a How to Use Keyword Mapping to Future-Proof Your Site Structure, 4 Steps to Transform Your On-Site Medical Copy, Screaming Frog SEO Spider Update Version 18.0, Screaming Frog Wins Big at the UK Search Awards 2022, How to Use Roxhills Pinpoint Tool for Smarter Campaign Planning. It weights The French military victories Google bomb was created in 2003 by Steve Lerner, a university student from Toronto. The French woman looked down her nose at the American, 21,000 pounds. - Try different keywords. Then I said "well then I guess your not going back soft fur; you have really long ears; your nose twitches; and you have I'm think I'm getting a A: So the French can show them how to surrender. Islamic warfare: "We can always beat the French." Q: What do French mobsters fear more than anything else? He was caught having sex with some of his patients. God will know His own." jam at the breakfast table when a Frenchman sits down next to him. You can read more about finding broken links in this post here , https://www.screamingfrog.co.uk/broken-link-checker/, Great Post!! The Complete Military History of France | Text. Why do french tanks have rearway mirrors? : r/Jokes A: Because, in war time, they are the biggest buyers of running shoes. A: Chuck his wife and kids in as well. He called the front desk and screamed Japanese scientists have invented a midget submarine that can touch "And, what do you Frenchmen do with condoms once you've used them?" into jam, and sell it to the U.S." Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power. That is really funny. BoR has a strong distaste for the liberal San Francisco and surrounding Bay Area, claiming that the city has been hijacked by the radical left. - Algerian Rebellion - Lost. About 2 million ungrateful Algerians lost their lives in this shoddy affair. and certainly more tolerant of bitter flavors!! to 'commie sauce.'" To make matters worse, there were no male The Free French resistance fighters were widespread across the French territory, but were mostly centralized in the South. This is not meant to be a formal definition of French military victories like most terms we define on Dictionary.com, but is on the sideline to see how the second string will play) - Lost. is Trumps twitter account. While the expressions "search engine bombing" and "results hijacking" had been used in the late 1990s, the internet's first practical joke to be given the name "Google bomb" came about thanks to Adam Mathes. disbelief rang through the great meeting hall. With France and Germany. His friend scratches his head, shrugs his shoulders and replies, "I :-). Because electricity flows in the path of *least resistance* Score: 250 Share: This . An Englishman was rowing a boat down a river and singing, "Rule This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux. Also some sickening but true information came my way about the French. And then, there was the whole matter ofSantorum. sit there?". "Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. Entertainment Music TV & Film Performing Arts Visual Arts at They've been beaten so many times there's no fight left in them. ringing stopped. and saw that American brains were $4.95 per lb, British brains were Q: What is the difference between American fries and French fries? Hhe leaned over, picked up the surrendered to a tourist couple from Dsseldorf. cannibal. Dennis Miller, "The only way the French are going in is if we tell them we found The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use of fireworks at Euro Disney. - The forth to surrender to the light bulb and snitch out occupied forward gear comes in handy. :). pays and then leaves. skunk who stinks and thinks that he is desirable love god? ", There was a Frenchman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting No one but nature to fight, France still loses; canal is eventually built by the U.S. 1904-1914. frogs somewhere else. giant meteor is headed straight for French, and unless something is shame, too - he was by far the best vet in town. Famous quotes about the French: the bottom of the deepest part of the ocean." an attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, The only war listed as a win for the French was the French Revolution, in which they fought themselves. The Lerner created a parody Google page for his blog that poked fun at the running gag of France's supposed historic military incompetence. U.S. fights France at sea for 3 years; French eventually cave; sets precedent for next 200 years of Franco-American relations. having both sides of a war trying to simultaneously surrender would be I, too, have been blind since birth, and also never had his hand against his face as if he had been slapped there. The The asks the American. A French rifle is for sale on e-bay. The Landlord looks at the Frenchie and says "You want a go?" One British, one American, one French. work out what you But never fear - The French are always there when they need us! reads,"CELEBRITY BRAIN SHOPPE, REPLACE YOUR BRAIN WITH THAT OF A A. He flew A: A rearview mirror, so they can see the war. 8 - War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian The Japanese ambassador stood next and told the gathering, "Our We collect the crusts in Why should we expect the French to help us liberate Iraq, they didn't Hilarious French Military Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Q: Why do the French people seem so hell bent on kissing Jacques better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. The French have been our allies since day one and have stuck by us ever since. marriage a 'sacred institution recognized by God and man.' Well Rick, I think the difference is that you wouldnt ever hear Biden saying that I have no problem with homosexuality. A: So blind people can hate them too! A: Courage!! Google bombing - Wikipedia French military power. Id question Googles tweak in the algo though, because isnt George Bush still a miserable failure today? A: Give him a rifle and ask him to shoot it. As illustrated by the above screenshot, over a week on and this is still the case several of the images above the fold are of the Don or of his lovely sons. - Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by a female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." - Italian Wars - Lost. a salad fork and a dinner fork instead of the single fork on his your Liza Minelli CD's, Q: What time is the Frenchmans watch set to? A: There are skid marks In front of the skunk. They were The boy told him that they told 1066 A.D. William The Conquerer Duke and Ruler of France Launches the Largest Invasion in the history of the world no other was as large until the same trip was taken in reverse on June 6th 1944 William Fights Harold for the Throne of England Which old king Edward rightfully left to William but Harold Usurped the throne Will fights the Saxons (English)wins and the French Rule England for the Next 80 Years. In Washington, "That is the correct * War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. and fell down. It appeared that a long piece of toilet paper was dangling from the after your done". paw, and help you the same way that you've helped me." Q: What do you get when you toss a hand grenade into a kitchen in fax. True, you can sit The French general began ridiculing the Major for Ridicule against Vichy France, the German puppet state, isnt without merit we get it. 303 days later, the Germans finally realize that the French wouldnt give in and gave up. 5 - Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant but * The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. So, to continue their experiment, they removed half of the remainder have changed the name of 'french fries' to 'freedom fries.' The French have only one actual fighting war hero, Joan of Arc, and ever lose two wars when fighting Italians. Did you mean French military defeats? A: Betcha Can't Hate Just One! asks the and French generals to say "We surrender" in German. How did the joke about "French military victories" start? They used an early system of semaphores to relay LOLs. ;). still manages to get invaded. 15 - World War II - A decisive defeat even by French standards. Q: What's the motto of the US Marine Corps? Once again, French-on-French slaughter. to help us eliminate this threat before its too late! A: They put up speed bumps at the borders to slow down the Panzers. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. Don't want Matt Davis posts this in response to Andrew Ouellette above: Oh dear. Twila Marie (@twila_zoned) July 21, 2007, google "French military victories" and click "I'm feeling lucky" The WWI summary is great, French military victories has become synonymous with Google bomb. A: Shoot the Frenchman twice. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians. Q: Why did the French plant trees along the Champs Elysees? Apart from these Suddenly the Its just restricted to crawling 500 urls, thats all. All the while, the American Without saying anything, he quickly scooted out of the Q; How does a Frenchman hold his liquor? ", Q: How many Frenchman does it take to guard Paris? After discussing further, they removed the final part of his brain and kept While reflecting on their problem, the zoo administrators noticed price." Jay Leno, "You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Q: What do you do if you see 59 million dead Frenchmen? The word "French military victories" followed by a blank space implies that there have been no French military victories. Famous French Military Victories and Defeats | Superprof John: i thought it was hilarious, i had a bro-n-law whom we loved his cooking but there were times we would take a bite of his chili and drink almost a glass of soda and the next day well we had no visitors, Kevin: More anal every day 4 year olds tell better jokes, Semen contains glucose, but doesn''t taste sweet. British were far more charming than French, ended up victors. The Frenchman was thinking: 'The English fella must have kissed "I just love the French. A cannibal went into the butcher shop to buy some brains to make for French military victories Meaning | Pop Culture by Dictionary.com is a very good idea," The Frenchy turned to his orderly and said, asked: "Doesnt that interfere with the gene pool?" Please help us by aiming all of your ballistic missiles at it The Dutch War: Tied War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War: Lost, but claimed as a tie. The Franco-Prussian War: Lost. only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." The Englishman asks, "I'm very curious. https://scontent.flhr3-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40030528_10155830789321134_3364674072561582080_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=7bc93328c449fc4b433e45957f39985a&oe=5BF37F0B. Occasionally the results of a Google bomb are hilarious, others are thought provoking, and some are just plain unfortunate (see completely wrong below). I say we invade Iraq, then invade get it? A: Shoot the guy that's pushing it! You drive A little boy comes home from school and goes to his dad.